Fast Forward

Make New Orleans
into medosphere 2

LOONEY TUNED. Department of Health and Human Services Secretary Michael Leavitt labeled post-Hurricane-Katrina New Orleans a "green-field opportunity" to create a "brand-new, top-to-bottom" healthcare system. And here’s how he should do it. First, convince his boss to pony up all the cash to rebuild and revitalize the place on one condition: NOLA comes under federal control. That means deputizing city, state and interested private individuals to follow orders from the feds and not vice versa.

Second, the federalized NOLA zone should be rechristened unofficially as Medosphere 2, just like the Biosphere 2 near Tucson, "the $150 million facility opened in 1991 as a massive closed system that would last for 100 years of testing nature, technology and human endurance" (according to the Biosphere 2 Web site). For the record, if you remember, the planet Earth is "Biosphere1." In Medosphere 2, the government could test out all of its hare-brained schemes and ill-conceived notions about federalized healthcare reform, national health information networks, reimbursement reimaginings and the like. In a live laboratory populated by citizens lured to participate via healthy tax breaks and other incentives (like working on the government payroll and enjoying the same healthcare plan as Congresspeople!), the feds can trial their versions of universal coverage, wireless electronic health records, clean item masters, controlled access to administrative and clinical caregivers by vendor reps and well-publicized transparent pricing for all procedures.

Third, appoint Newt Gingrich national director for healthcare quality and efficiency within HHS and executive director of Medosphere 2 so he can put all of his showboating oratory to actual practice. Honestly, this is a win-win solution for two reasons. First, if the government’s ideas and Gingrich’s leadership prove successful then they can be projected and implemented nationwide, and America’s healthcare system would become the envy of the world. Second, if it fails there’s another option.

What happened to Biosphere 2? Well, the Biosphere 2 Web site reports that "two early human survival missions lasted for two years and six months, respectively," which hardly qualifies it as a success if you compare it to the mission statement. Today, Biosphere 2 is a bonafide tourist attraction, as could NOLA’s Medosphere 2, which would eventually recoup America’s investment in it if Disney and Microsoft were involved. And the healthcare industry seems to be enamored with Disney, as noted by the recent AHRMM annual meeting general session, "If Disney Ran Your Hospital, You Would Make Courtesy More Important Than Efficiency." Of course, with the "FastPass" you’d get quicker access to your healthcare experience, leading some to cry "discrimination" and "the system is broken" because only the more lucrative private payer patients would qualify. Come to think of it, this sounds a lot like what we have now.

USER ERROR. The United States Government Accountability Office (GAO) released a report on health information technology, saying that the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) is continuing efforts to define its national strategy. With a 2014 deadline, apparently they’re in no hurry. After all, coming up with a workable and worthwhile strategy should take longer than three years – even if the taxpayers are bankrolling all the "strategery" going on in Washington. Now imagine if Microsoft ran your health information technology initiative…but forget it. The government doesn’t do windows.

VITAMIN CEO. During the closing keynote address at the annual AHRMM conference in Orlando, Phillip Newbold, president and CEO, Memorial Health System (South Bend, IN) seemingly enthralled a rapt audience to ignite their energy and passion (by going on field trips and site visits to successful organizations!) and exercise their creative muscles. Three thoughts immediately came to mind. 1. If all hospital CEOs were like him, shirt starch would go the way of New Coke and Crystal Pepsi. 2. Wouldn’t it be great to work for this guy? The materials managers at his organization’s facilities (if they were in the crowd) must be having the time of their lives at one of the few dream jobs in the industry. 3. If I were a materials manager in a hospital that was $25 million in the red with doctors and nurses screaming about not having the right products available and a continually dirty item master I’m not fully convinced I’d be allowed to break away for a tour of Ben & Jerry’s Homemade Inc.’s corporate headquarters to buff my right brain. Just sayin’.

Make haste, not waste, readers.