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CORN BALL. The April 6 Des Moines Register reported that U.S. Sen. Charles Grassley wants federal investigators to determine whether nonprofit hospitals deserve the billions of dollars they receive in tax exemptions. "We need to get a better handle on how nonprofit hospitals are fulfilling their requirement to serve the community in exchange for the generous tax breaks they receive," Grassley was quoted. Great plan, senator. Take away the tax breaks not-for-profit hospitals need to provide uncompensated care and watch those hospitals, regardless of their inefficiencies and wasteful spending, either cut their services or redirect all of those patients to the undoubtedly welcoming investor-owned hospitals. Maybe your former senatorial colleague from Tennessee and perennial presidential aspirant, Bill Frist, whose family created the nation’s largest investor-owned hospital chain, will revel in all of the additional business.

RIM SHOT. If anyone wonders why talk of a paperless system continues to be just that – talk, for the most part – that person should look to mid-April’s BlackBerry service outage as one more excuse/reason to procrastinate. Research In Motion (RIM) may have dismissed the problem and vowed to prevent it from happening again but that doesn’t repair the damage (perception or reality) to the credibility or reliability of electronic business and communications tools.

PERFECT TIMING. Due to a "complicated funding problem in state government," according to a report in the Miami Herald, Florida hospital officials warned that they may lose tens of millions of dollars next year. Meanwhile, in an unrelated story but ironic development, former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush joined Tenet Healthcare Corp.’s board of directors after it ponied up millions in civil fines to finally put its fiscal hijinks behind them. Is chutzpah a four- or five-letter word?

IT CROWD. New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg wants EHRs in place by 2012, two years earlier than President Bush’s deadline. Meanwhile, New York Governor Eliot Spitzer charges that if healthcare facilities acquire this technology in any other way than paying for it outright (forget those safe harbor-okayed giveaways), then he’s coming after you. Gov. Spitzer, meet Sen. Grassley. Of course, given the government’s track record for effectively using IT to the fullest potential, he’ll probably find perpetrating freeloaders by 2016, just in time for a White House run.

SLEEPY HOLLOW. New research suggests that napping on the job can reduce risks for fatal heart attacks, particularly among men. It’s the whole "napping reduces heart-attack-inducing stress, which jobs tend to create" explanation. Of course, surgeons should avoid this strategy at all costs for malpractice’s sake (even though they probably could use the shut-eye). They commit enough errors while wide awake.

DATA DETONATION. The following headlines have been seen within the last few months. "U.S. Healthcare System Gets Poor Scores on Quality, Access, Efficiency and Equity." "Healthcare costs rise twice as much as inflation." "Quality of healthcare in U.S. improves." "Health records at risk of being disclosed." "Medicare and Medicaid security gaps are found." "Report faults FDA on drug safety." "Nearly 50 percent of hospital EDs are overcrowded." "Medicaid spending rises only slightly." "Drug reactions send 700,000 yearly to ER." "U.S. Lags in Several Areas of Health Care, Study Finds." "Global health care headed for sick bay, report says," making note that the U.S. "spends 2.4 times more on health care than the average industrialized nation, the World Health Organization ranks it 37th in overall health system performance." With such an accurate and reliable barometer it’s no wonder why so little changes.

Celebrate success, readers.